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For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off.
-
Johnny Carson
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Thanksgiving is an emotional holiday. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they only see once a year. And then discover once a year is way too often.
Happiness is your dentist telling you it won’t hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.
Talent alone won’t make you a success. Neither will being in the right place at the right time, unless you are ready. The most important question is: ’Are your ready?’
Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die.
If it weren’t for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we’d still be eating frozen radio dinners.
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself.
For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off.